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Hey, so my boyfriend of 5 years (yes, 5 years sounds like a joke but hes like a best friend and a boyfriend to me) and I have been talking about having a baby for about a year now. So first off let me tell you about my boyfriend, hes 16 and he does not attend school but has a full time job at Pizza Hut and is hoping to get into TAFE or go off to work with my brother (who is a carpenter looking for young workers) very soon. He is a very loving person, and has treated me so well these passed few years. Now, for myself, I work at a gym in the Creche where I care for kids under 18 months and over. We feed and sometimes change the children if parents are in classes or a PT session, I've had this job since last year in September and have already earnt $2000 from that job. I am saving to buy a car, and I go for my learners in 3 months (when I turn 16). My boyfriend and I want a baby next year, around near my birthday (when I will be turning 17) I should have my car by than and my license, I said I will try and attend school as much as possible until it is definitely impossible to get out of bed! Than we discussed about when it is born, since my boyfriend does not go to school and only works afternoon shifts at the moment, he was going to care for the child whilst I was at school, and I can always bring him/her to work with me (staff are allowed to bring in their children since its a creche). My boyfriend has saved up a good amount of money for next year, and my parents are willing to give me $1000 towards my car than I will have at least $5000 by the time I go to buy one, and surely for my first care I wouldn't want a new one, so one that will be about $3000 max. That is basically our plan so far. What do you think? (Please no negative comments, just mature opinions about this).
It's a horrible idea. I think you two need to live a little bit more before you get pregnant. By living, I mean trying to survive on your own. Plus you're not even out of school yet. Do you even live on your own? First, the car idea is kind of bad. Have you found cars in your area that are in your price range? I would be scared that the cars you find may not be good cars. Start looking now and see if you can get a car in that range that your mechanic friends or professional mechanic says it is safe. I found a good car for 8,000 but it has higher mileage. Next, what will happen when something breaks in the car? Do you think that you would be able to put money into the car? There's always a good chance you may have to put several thousand into the car within the first few years if there is heavy wear and tire on the car. Do you know how much you will spend on gas? Third, if you live at home don't you kind of think that is selfish to expect your parents to help provide for a third person? Yes, you may say that you will provide for the baby, but chances are they will be asked to babysit more or to watch the child when the child is sick and you are at work. When the infant cries, it will wake them up too. Honestly? You should aspire to provide the child with your own apartment or house. It's kind of like a kid wants to play house when they still live with their parents and want to have a baby. It's sad. Also, you should work on your savings. 2,000 will not be enough to live on. You should have six months of expenses saved up including car payments, rent, utilities, renter's insurance, car insurance, cellphone payments, gas, food, entertainment, etc. You should also include other services like daycare, copays, formula even if you breast feed, budget for clothes, emergency babysitting, etc if you have children. You should also budget for your boyfriend too and he should have his own personal fund too. Meaning you both have six months in case you both lose your jobs. Don't touch this under any circumstances except that you lose your money source. Next, you should a minimum of 5,000 saved up for an emergency fund. This is to be used should you have an emergency expense like you break an arm, are hospitalized, car breaks down, etc. It should be higher than 5,000 if you can afford it. A holiday is not an emergency so don't use it for that. Having 2,000 left over is kind of scary for me. I cannot imagine letting my savings get that low. That is what I keep in one of my savings account to transfer into my checking account for casual spending money. I am not rich, but that's not enough to raise a family on. Also, what type of credit do you have? You aren't able to sign for a car loan. You aren't able to get a credit card. You aren't able to get a house. Trust me, those things matter down the line. Also, do you live in a nice neighborhood (assuming you don't live at home with your parents)? Can you afford to move into your dream home? Would you feel safe letting your kid play outside? Is there even a spot for the child to play outside? If you live at home, what happens when you get sick of living at home and want to move out? Can you afford to live alone? I also don't think you truly understand that a baby will wake you up constantly. You won't feel refreshed in the morning because the child probably will wake you up several times. Going to school and working may not be an option. Going to an online school will be hard too. Also, if you want to go to college or university, it will be a struggle. You will have to work around your partner's schedule and you will have to find tie to study. Children do not understand that mommy needs to do well on a test. Also, do you even have any money saved for retirement? The earlier you save for retirement, the better off you will be. Saving 1,000 dollars for ten years is better than saving 5,000 dollars in your 30s due to the way interest is figured. Working full-time at Pizza Hut isn't really a career. It is a job. He should be going to school and finding a career. How much do you think your boyfriend will make working as a carpenter? How many hours a week will he be able to work? Will his schedule change so you won't be able to rely on him? What does he do? Does he make more than minimum wage? Is he dependent on tips? How much do you really make per pay period? Wait till you guys are able to move out of your parents house. Live together for two or three years too to make sure you can stand each other living in close quarters. Also, consider marriage for legal benefits at least. It is far, far easier to divorce a person than to work out custody agreements. A baby isn't a dog that you can give back and if down the line you can't stand living together, then you are stuck to them.
Do not do it. I am 20 and soon to have my baby boy this week. I moved in with my boyfriend since November.( been together about 2 years) It has been very very difficult you really get to know a person. ESPECIALLY if you move in with other people and not have your own place. I live with my in laws...... It is very very expensive to keep up with rent, insurance, bills . I was active before getting pregnant, with a job, and always having the freedom of going out but now its hard to be so active 40 weight gain and no job. No energy to go out because of the way i look...EVERYTHING changes hun. You two should just have fun and spend as much time together you two are not ready for a baby! Im still not ready and my due date is tomorrow and im five years older than you! Just wait until u two are married and are settled down it will make things way easier..dont try to rush into things hun trust me!:) make a smart choice finish school so u can provide the best for ur child trust me its hard being preg and being a full time student°-°
Sorry, but gotta agree with the previous answers. i've had friends in like positions, and while they are not you or your boyfriend, i can certainly say that they wished they didn't. not because they do not love the child they have had now, but because having a child puts a lot of strain on everything. money may come into play and that can honestly make or break a relationship (especially with a family). wait until you're 18. at least. please. even if you really think you're ready. please also think of the child. are you ready to move out an on your own at 17? or move your boyfriend into your house or you into his in order to care for this baby? an salary of $4000 annually is not enough to support a family. sorry.
Hey you don't know me but I wish I did because I would slap you back into reality! What the hell is wrong with you, you need to have a sit and take your behind to school somewhere (college) do you have any idea how hard it is to take care of a baby, a Pizza Hut job and a babysitting job is NOT going to take care of a child!!! DO NOT PUT YOURSELF Helena A POSITION TO STRUGGLE because your going to need help, and with a child you must Handle that responsibiy on your own! You don't have any money,nor do you have a career/degree to support this child your talking about having! Girl, please don't make life hard on yourself, wait until your 21 older around the exact time you'll graduate from a 4year college if you go! Times are hard, they don't have 401k's you must go to school so you can focus on how your gonna take care of yourself when your elderly before you think about having a baby. Your too young, wait until your life is in order!!!!! Sheesh, this is coming from a 22year old female by the way! Ps can you guys please go answer my question, I need advice ASAP!
Do further research on how much money needed to buy baby clothing (just cheaper/2nd hand ones), diapers, milk, medic shots, etc and put it in your calculation. If you think you can pay for those as well...your choice, or you can save for another year/few months and try for a baby then.
Don't do it. You don't know the future and what will come of the whole situation. Wait until you're adults or you'll ruin your lives. Trust me.