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    I have a gross income of $78,000. After taxes, 401 K, health insurance, and loan payments for a loan I took out against my 401K (to pay legal bills) my net income's gonna be about $4000 a month. I was looking at Maryland's child support and alimony guidelines. If my to-be-ex-wife gets what she wants, she will get $1,400 in child support and $1,200 in alimony every month, and will be left with $1,400 a month take home. I will still have to pay for the kid's health insurance (already deducted), I will still have to feed them and such when they are at my house. My to-be-ex makes $800 a month take home. She will get the child support and alimony totalling $2,600 a month, plus she will get about $4,000 in IRS tax credits per year (about $350 a month), even after paying no income taxes. So, her take-home income will be $2,900 a month. I have to live off of $1,400 a month (37.5% of my take-home income) and she gets more than twice this ammount, $2,900 a month (72% of my take-home income)? I am well aware that child support is the child's money, not the mother's money. however, it is the parents who must pay the bills,a nd the parent who chose whether to spend the money on the kids or not and how. Child support payments that render one parent homeless, and the other financially independent have nothing to do with the benefit of the children, particularly if one parent has the kids up to 30% of the time, and no providion is made for the reduced cost to the custodial parent or the increased cost to the non-custodial parent. Ignoring certain facts to ensure a certain outcome is no way to set public policy. For that matter, basing custody decisions on the number of bedrooms in the non-custodial parent's home vs. the custodial parent's home, despite the fact that the non-custodial parent is financing the custodial parent's larger house is somewhat unfair. Also unfair is the idea that if the mom runs off with the kids, she can keep them until the matter is taken before the court, where the mere fact that she ran off with them in the first place and has had them for a months helps her case. I am not saying that someone making 78K a year, who sees his kids every other weekend shouldn't have to pay 1400 a month. I was complaining about the additional alimony payment of 1200 a month, mainly, and the fact that this would leave me with $1100 a month. Now, I would think that if the cust. parent made $15K a year, or was capable of working but was unemployed, and the non-cust. parent was making $35K or more a year, and there were 3 kids, and the non-cust. parent had the kids 2 weekends a month, about $1000 to $1400 a month would be appropreate. She receives social security for being bi-polar, and that's why alimony is an possibility, even though we were only married 3.5 years. I fail to see thought why, if you marry a "disabled" person, they are your responsibility for the rest of your life. It's not adoption, it's marriage. Being bi-polar does not mean you can leave your husband and expect him to support you for the rest of your life, does it? Besides, she already gets support from Social security. Why should being married 30 years ago get you more money than any other disabled person. And then there's the whole issue of her receiving the same ammoung of money and being treated the same as somebody with no arms or legs. That doesn't seem fair to me. The basic custody issue is a long story, and even more unfair, but I won't go into it.

    Yes, you are all paying for her SSI and her tax credits. Social security seems to think that the first time you apply, you are not disabled, no matter what, but if you appeal 2 or 3 times over 1 or 2 years, then you can get it for anything that you claim renders you unable to work. She used to wait tables, work at target, work in a slaughterhouse, work for a travel agency, work as a secretry, work at a fast food restaurant. She held all of these jobs for only 1 to 4 weeks, but she did not have a breakdown or get depressed, she was just lazy, and got tired of getting up in the morning. I am certain that the bi-polar is a mis-diagnoisis. She is a hypochondriac, a compulsive liar, lazy, two faced, ruthless, self-centered, uncaring, and back-stabbing all the time, and is never really depressed and never out of control except when she was abusing drugs. In any even all that happened when she was not on the meds, and she supposedly is on the meds now, and her behavior is just a bad.

    As I said, the basic custody issue is a long story, and even more unfair. I had full custody for 6 years, we got back together for 3, and she left me and made false charges of child and spousal abuse. We settled out-of-court, though, and I got joint custody. She made another false child and spousal abuse charge, and got my kids to go along, which shocked and saddened me, and I had to settle for supervised visitation at my home 2 weekends a month. She made yet another false child abouse charge, and is currently trying to get 1 hour a week of supervized visitation, but this time my daughter admitted lying, my other daughter told the truth, and there were a dozen witnesses arond both me and her the entire time for hours before and after the abuse was supposed to have happened. She knew it was a lie too, because she never even asked her or anyone what happened when my daughter went home early. She just filed charges, even though my older daughter told her it was a lie.

    There is no point negotiating with her. She lies as fast as she can talk, and is beligerent, and does nothing but play games. I hope I never have to talk to her again. I tried family counselling a year ago. She just tried to win the counsellor to her side, even lying when I wasn't there and in my face. In the end, the counsellor was asking me to appologize to her for things that never occurred. If i defended myself, the counsellor stopped me and dismissed what I said as if it was never said. It became just another form of emotional abuse, except she had a shrink helping her, and my children were there absorbing it all as if it was true and made sense.

    Welcome to the welfare state of America. Lets not forget that it's all of us who are also chipping in for here SS payments, tax credits, and other social cash equivalents. But in this day and age...alimony is completely outdated.

    Well there is this, I have a friend who receives $5000 per month in alimony and she has to pay taxes on it every year. So your wife should have to also. And you get to deduct it. You need a good attorney though. I have another friend who got so screwed he ended up working 2 full time and 1 part time job just to pay the insurance and child support. He also ended up living with his mother. I would definitely fight the alimony if I were you. She needs to get a better job than $800 per month. That sounds like part time work. She needs a full time job. But get use to the child support payment though. That you will get hit with unless you file for custody but then again you need a good attorney. Expensive but well worth the money.

    I am a woman who makes less then my husband and I'm so glad I live in an alimony free state!! I would never get it here and I'm ok with that because I think it's WRONG!! You should have to pay child support for your children but NEVER alimony!! And I really don't think being bi-polar should be a disability that gets her ssi!! That's BS!! She needs to get off her lazy butt and go get a job. No reason she can't work, just take meds. And personally, I feel that if she really can't work because of being bipolar, she shouldn't be allowed to have custody of her children either. I'm a woman and I'm totally on your side here!!

    If she receives alimony then she will no longer receive SSI..... you can not get SSI if you have another income..... also, if you are paying for more than half of the childs support (which you will be) you can ask the court at the time of the judgement that you be allowed to claim your child on your taxes.... it's done all the time if the father is paying more in child support than the mother is making .... get yourself a lawyer... there are many who specialize in father's rights.... in the end it will be worth the money...

    Marriage counseling cost much less than divorce! Also why don't you get custody of the children so you don't have to pay child support? If she is "disabled" she probably isn't the best parent for custody is she?????? Tuscaloosa is there more to the story that you are not telling us?

    Maybe what you should do is ask your lawyer to up the child support but fight to not have pay her alimony. Being bipolar does not make her unable to work. She is just as culpable in the dissolution of your marriage as you are.

    Ouch. You are getting a rough deal, man. It does seem like she'll be racking it in. What does your lawyer say about this? Can you appeal? So she is totally disabled and can't work at all? She can't even sit at a computer and type? Like data-entry or something like that? I'm mean, she has to take care of your child. Sorry...I'm asking you more questions than you asked.

    Not sure about Maryland laws, but here in Georgia, the state takes BOTH incomes into consideration. You should be married for ten years for her to be eligible for alimony.

    I'm on benefits because i suffer from social anxiety and i mean i really suffer. you hate me don't you, you think i'm a piece of ****. will this piece of **** was raped 5 times by her mothers boyfriend when she was 9. hey why don't i kill myself, then you would be happy. one less person on benefits. i can't stop crying cos of people like you, cos you scared me so much. look up sexual abuse and social anxiety and welcome to my world of hell

    I am not good at math, i quit reading after the first sentence.

Should i move on campus for my sophomore year and possibly through my senior year even if it cost more?

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    Willow Casper
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