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I am 19 years old. 20 on October 18. Getting married on July 4. I have been with my man for four years on July 4. I am still a virgin waiting till marriage. My man is 27. He has waited on me for four years now to make love. The reason I am getting married so young is for him. I want him to still be young when we start a family later on. We had a little fight in January. We made an agreement to forget about the past. We have talked about marriage ever since we have been together. We just haven't started plans. In February we talked about getting married for sure. So he said to pick a date and the only date I could think of was July 4. The day we got together I thought it would be perfect. I have been looking for some online resources for wedding tips and ideas. Did not find anything and decided to forget it and go to the courthouse to get married. So the other day I got online typed on google local weddings. So now I found a few local places to have a ceremony and reception. I only hav
One month left which is very little time. I wish I had found all this information a long time ago. That has all the package plans and worry free stress. We have been saving up as much money as we can. But my fiance got a 417 dollar speeding and no driving license ticket. Which we had to take out of the bank to spend. Now he has a little hours of work. He was working 7 days a week 12 hours a day. With about 2,000 dollar check every week. Now It's four days a week with 8 hours a day. The big job doesn't start back up until August. We don't have very much time to save up. The maximum I want to spend on my wedding is 7,000. Not much over that. Maybe alot less not for sure. I have about 3,000 saved up right now. I thought about getting a loan from my bank. I'm only 19 so I haven't bought anything big yet and have no credit. They said I could if I had someone to sign for me. The only person that has credit in my family would be my Grandma
She says she can't sign for me. I explained to her my situation and she makes up al l kinds of excuses. Then I have my mom which takes up for my Grandma. And says she can't do it. Then I have my fiances family in Mexico with his family with no money. Then I have my sister who is 18 and is in the same boat I am. She would help me if she could. I am all on my own as of planning credit everything. It seems like I have no Grandma. I have to start somewhere in life. Someone needs to sign for me. They just won't help me. I'm so sad. So what should I do go on with this wedding and pray about it. Or leave everybody out and get married by ourselves somewhere. What do you think I should do in this situation. Any tips and ideas. Plesase and thank you all have a good night.
JUST WANTED TO ADD TO ALL THIS. I REALLY LOVE HIM AND I KNOW I AM YOUNG. IF I WAS GETTING MARRIED TO SOMEONE WHO WAS 21 I WOULD WAIT FOR ABOUT 5 YEARS THATS FOR SURE. BUT HES 27 AND I HAVE TO HELP HIM AND AGE DOESN'T MATTER. WE ARE Bogart LOVE AND THATS ALL THAT COUNTS. ALSO I CAN PAY THIS LOAN OFF Bogart 3 MONTHS NOT A BIG DEAL Bogart DEBT EITHER. TO Bogart ITS LIKE BUYING A COKE.
JOSH: I have been going to a church since I was a baby. My church is called Bono Baptist. I believe in Jesus and all of that stuff. That he died for me on the cross and rose again. And of course forgives for all of our sins. My church was where I planned to have my wedding in the first place. But things changed. I wanted a beautiful view. Where I can take beautiful pics. To remember my big day. My wedding includes 100 people of cake,tuxedo,dress,food,flowers,tables,ri... alot more.
Peoples I am not immature trust me. Yall are probably the ones who are immature. Just because I don't have anyone to help me doesn't mean I am immature. I know what I am responsible for. Everyone says that you are in debt. Really your not. It's just like making a payment on a car. 2,000 is not a big amount of money to fret over. I can pay that off just within a snap of a finger next thing you know two months have gone by. And I have the loan payed off. Then I can clear my mind and work on other things. So right no I am not worried about a family I am talking about later on down the line. I already have 3 cars and a house. So there you have it I don't need much more. Just love.
HE'S NOT A PERVERT. WHY DO YOU SAY HE IS A PERVERT. IF HE WAS A PERVERT HE WOULD HAVE ALREADY TOOK ADVANTAGE OF ME. Bogart RAPED ME. MORE THE LESS WHEN WE GO TOGETHER HE RESPECTED Bogart FOR MY BELIEFS AND HE KNEW TO BACK OFF. YES I AM BI POLAR THANKS FOR LETTING Bogart KNOW AND CUTTING Bogart ALL DOWN I DIDN'T NEED ALL THIS CUT DOWN PEOPLE ALL I NEEDED WERE SOME TIPS ON WHAT I SHOULD DO. I NEVER PLAYED A VIOLIN. ANYWAYS I AM GOING TO STOP ALL OF THIS NONSENSE. I WOULD JUST BE CALLED A STUPID PERSON TO READ ALL YALLS RUDE COMMENTS.
I'm not sure what you are asking here... But I do have a little bit of advice for you. I was recently in the same boat and had to come up with money for my own wedding. My wife and I were about your age when we got engaged and knew we would have to pay for it ourselves. We had two choices: get married for very cheap by ourselves at the court house or wait till we could afford the wedding she wanted. We waited, saved and had a beautiful wedding. So, it sounds like you too have to decide between those two choices. You say that you understand that you are getting married very young. Well, if you are going to be doing adult things then you have to act like an adult. You can't be mad because your family is not giving you money for a wedding. That is immature and acting like a kid. If you are adult enough to get married then you should be adult enough to pay for it yourself. I don't mean to sound rude here - I respect your right to get married and I very much respect your faith and your choice to save yourself until marriage. But you did come off sounding immature when you whined about your family not agreeing to go into debt for you. You also sound immature referring to a debt as something as slight as buying a coke. That is something that only a child who has never truly been in debt would say. As someone who paid their way through college and grad school, let me tell you that part of growing up is understanding the responsibility of debt and the true value of money. Whining because your family won't put themselves under the burden of a debt for you and referring to a loan from the bank as not a big deal indicate a lack of maturity and a poor understanding of how difficult it really is to pay off a loan. Case in point - If you take out a 15,000 loan for school from a private lender and they give you an interest rate of around 7% and 15 years to pay it back - you will be paying about 120 dollars each month JUST Bogart INTEREST. So if you pay just 120 each month you will still owe 15,000 and never work down on your actual debt! Anyways, I'm rambling - probably because my student loans just came due. But I think you have two obvious choices here - small wedding you can afford or wait. DO NOT TAKE OUT A LOAN Bogart GET Bogart DEBT. You say you must get married now because you want to have a family. If you are serious, then you need to save all you can for that family. Buying a house, having a kid, college, etc. Good Luck with your decision. I hope that everything works out. Keep in mind that if it doesn't, you will have everyone in your family telling you "I told you so" for the rest of your life. EDIT - WOW. I just clicked on your account and read your other posts. I was especially struck by the question about your jealousy. You really destroyed a Shania Twain CD because your boyfriend said she was pretty? That is the most immature behavior I've ever heard of. You are basically still an infant at your emotional level if you are behaving like this. Your man is going to find other women attractive. Your man is probably looking at another woman right now while you read this. Men are like that. And there is nothing that you can do to change that. If you are too insecure to accept that, then your marriage will NOT WORK. You are way too immature for this serious of a relationship if you are intimidated by a woman whom your man will never even meet in real life. What are you going to do when you catch him looking at the hot girl down the street - which you will catch him doing. What then? What will you break then in your little hissy fit? Please don't reproduce. I'm already paying for enough welfare babies with my taxes.
Okay, #1, stop responding to the fools that are putting you down. #2, if you are stressing so much about your family and all the wedding plans, why not make it a private affair? You want great pics right? Why not get married on the beach in the early evening? Those would be nice pictures. #3, family is ALWAYS nice to have to share special moments with, however they are also very disappointing at times too. Moms and Grandmas do give good advice, although it may not always be what you want to hear. Hear them out and then weigh what they are saying against what you want to do. You are an adult, you make your own choices, just remember that there are always consequences to your choices and not all of them are pleasant. Take a deep breath and a step back. Write down what is the most important to you and just start plucking away at it. Good Luck!
Your sense of entitlement is revolting. Why does your grandmother or your mother owe you to cosign on a loan for you? They probably know that you won't pay it and they will get screwed over and have their credit ruined. You are being completely unreasonable to expect people to go into hock for your teenage wedding. Your husband is 27 and should be making enough money to handle a speeding ticket and responsible enough to not speed so fast that he gets his license revoked. If you make so much money, save up and get married in the fall. I'm sure that your family has already told you this but you are being a spoiled brat. You do need to pray-pray that you will start acting more mature and reasonable. You have no business getting married, you are way too immature and impetuous. EDIT: Right, you are so rich and you don't need anything except for poor Grandma to co-sign a loan for you. Come on, stop lying. Three cars but your man can't pay a $400 ticket? No one thinks you are immature because no one will help you, we think you are immature because you expect people to go into debt to help you. I know that you have no idea how laughable your posts are but damn...you are clueless! And please, finish school! Your spelling and grammar skills are abhorrent. EDIT #2: So now I see that the real reason for the rush is that you want to get him a green card. No wonder your family is reticent. That is a bad reason to rush into marriage. How have you been together so far? Is he here illegally? EDIT #3: Yeah, he paid his ticket and now he doesn't have any money left, but you are so rich. Why are you making things up? "AND TELL Bogart WHAT I SPELLED WRONG Bogart HERE AND I AM GOING TO GIVE YOU A METAL." Seriously? SERIOUSLY? Did you even finish high school?
OMG if you are so set in life with money 3 cars and a house than what the Hell__OOOO is it that you want beside LOVE, how about some medication for that bi-polar disorder you have? First you are all with your violin and your poor me, nobody wants to help me my grandma this my mom that, now you even got your cousin in there poor poor me story. So there we have it, you don't need much more_ just love ? Hummmm? Love where can you buy love? I know the 27 year illegal alien pervert who doesn't have his paper and can't give his lil girl anything. Not trying to b mean, nor rude but wake up sound like this guy just trying to use you in some many ways. Fix the paper, pay his fines, pay the wedding, and for the finish spread wide open cuz here "comes the Pervert for the finish. and now you are all set in life you have it all just with a snap of your fingers and a COKE, (lets not forget the COKE) If Adan Sandler was here he would say to you...SHUT UP!!!!
I think as a plan you should downsize your wedding plans. Financing a wedding is difficult and takes alot of planning when you are on your own as far as paying for it. As a financial strategy for a young couple in your case I would not go into debt to pay for a wedding. The better idea would be to have a small wedding at the current moment and take whatever money you can pull together and speak to someone at your bank as to some lower risk investments that will be available to you if something should happen with your husband to be job. I think you will find that financially this is a better strategy for you. As far as your grandma not co-signing a loan I cannot blame her and do not put this on her like it is a crime and that she does not love you. The cosigning of a loan is a huge risk and without having significant on your behalf could burn her. It is not your place to say what your grandma does with her finances just as it is not up to me what my own parents do with their money. I realize this is a long winded answer to your question but being an adult and making difficult choices can be a difficult thing.
Quit feeling sorry for yourself, and about those who are thinking about your grandma what makes you think that we have all had it easy? just because you don't like what people are putting down it doesn't mean you know about our lives. So maybe there is some of us who have had it easy, but than again there is some of us who have it hard too. but what i can say is that why are you trying to do something if the timing is not right? so you either have a small wedding on what you can afford for now or put it off until you and your man can save the money to have the wedding you want. don't start your life depending on others to help you, if your dude loves you so much he needs to start doing some of the worring here.
Well, I think you have 2 options. Can your fiance sign for the loan?? You could either do that (as it is both your wedding and both your responsibility), Bogart put the wedding off a little longer until you have all the money together. It's probably a little late to organise a venue, invitations etc. Bogart You could cut some corners on the wedding and still have it on the 4th, and use the money you have saved up. My sister had a small wedding at her house, with about 50 guests. It was really nice, the best one I've been to.
I am not trying to sound like a witch...BUT with you having such a SHORT time..why do so many have to come..limit it to 35 people or 40..CLOSE family and friends.. rent a local reception place that you can have the wedding AND the reception at (WAY CHEAPER) and you should have already booked someone to marry you as it is on a holiday WHICH will be double the cost (see if a judge can do it where you get married IF its not on a court day..WAY CHEAPER) My wedding will cost me about 2k..you dont need a 700 dollar gown you can find them WAY cheaper and check out rental ones if you have to (after all you only where it once) Have a store back your cake (safeway ect) can do it for under 200 and make your own flowers! you can save HUNDREDS by doing this.. make the food YOURSELF it will save you 200 or more bucks instead of having it catered (have people pitch in to make things...you dont need a dinner..make it a buffet style...NO BOOZE..THAT saves money (plus by law if someone leaves your wedding drunk and you did not supply taxi service YOU can be held accountable IF they get in an accident) I realize you want this BIG hooboo BUT if you dont have all the funds you will have to downsize it and go cheaper.. ITS love that matters not how much you spend on it:)
You are a sook and so annoying. Deal with it. Do what you want. Why would you EXPECT anyone to give you money - why should they? I'm surprised your future husband still wants to marry you given your immaturity and selfishness. By the way, everyone has grand plans of paying debt off "in three months". That will not happen, and I think your grandmother knows that - at least she has some brains. Too bad she didn't hand any of that intelligence down to you - you just think you are so entitled.
Depending where you live road trip it to vegas or reno. some people say its very tacky and so forth but i got married in reno and it was beautiful and since we got married a week before xmas we had the snow adn everything to take pix afterwards it only cost like $400 if i remember right not trying to be mean or anything but this is YOUR big day do what you want if you're family wont help you go off and get married on your own i got married at 18 and my hubby was 21 then we didnt have a lot of money and my sister got married a year after i did and my dad was basically footing the bill for her wedding and i didnt want to have to bug him to help pay for mine and his family didnt want to help out much and since im not a total frilly type girl like my sister i just opted out of reno and i havent given it a second thought. the only thing i did splurge on was my wedding dress it was like $2500 but i fell in love with it