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I'm gay, and I get the "gay ghetto" allure. But, my gay/lesbian friends mostly live in densely populated parts of the Metro Aliamanu area (DC, Arlington, Alexandria, Fairfax). A lot of them pay exorbitant rent, have sold their car, live with roommates in a tiny apartment, work 12 hour days, and party at the clubs whenever they have a day off the next day and they buy things to try to stay as trendy as they would like to be, and yet they complain that they're always broke. With all this going on, why do they look down on me because I live 35 minutes down the highway in Prince William? It's cheaper, I own my own home, I have a car to drive wherever I want (not just where the train goes), and I save tons of money each month. If they want to improve their lifestyle, why don't they get out of DC, Arlington, Alexandria, and Fairfax? Why is it so important to them that they live in the most expensive areas of town? Please answer beyond "personal preference". There must be some logic to it. Why would someone make an irrational life choice that keeps them constantly working, and perpetually broke, when there is a more than reasonable alternative available to them, and it ain't "the sticks" either.
Basically it's "zip-code" elitism. it's better if you just realize that some people will always create lines of division if only for the purpose of differentiation and to elevate themselves from the "plebeians". Some if not most people get a sense of satisfaction by constructing these types of caste systems if only to say "I am better than you" "I'm worth more than you" Gays are not exempt from this, if anything gays will be more prone to this behaviour since they are usually an oppressed class and have more or less experienced some from of oppression since High School, perhaps younger. so they want to validate their own existences.... The chief way of doing so is through the acquisition of material objects, and the higher prized the material objects are then the more "esteemed" they believe that have become.
Some people choose to be in areas where they can be with other gay people 24/7. It's like that in West Hollywood, where the situation is exactly what you say here; expensive rent, crap parking, and clubbing all the time. Living in the Valley while I was there kept me from being a die-hard member of the community, but it also meant that I wasn't out doing things that I could have ended up doing, which I am thankful for. I personally find that I prefer living in a mixed community with straight and gay people, but a lot of gay men disagree with that and want to inundate themselves in gayness. Some move on past it, and some don't.
Schitts McGee nailed it. Zipcode elitism. The same thing here in Philly as well as in other larger cities. We have two kinds of those people. The ones who HAVE to live in 19103/19107. Or the ones who live in the "trendy" areas of the city or outskirts of the city. Places one would not feel comfortable walking around at night but during the day it's an "up and coming neighborhood". People are so concerned on how people perceive them it's goes way past the borderline of pathetic. I know friends who have two or three jobs (which none of their other "cooler" friends know about) just so they can keep their head above their debts. And this is gay and straight friends/acquaintances who do this. They feel they need their own 'Sex in the City' moment and it's simply pure fantasy. They delude themselves into thinking that the shows they see on t.v. is actually what real people do in reality. It's pure delusion.